Archive

Browse all posts from the start. The first 10 entries were written over one weekend with the aim of sharing them with friends and family to help them understand me better.


Where to begin?

If you’re expecting a clear cut explanation of how I have strongly identified with being a woman my whole life, you won’t find it here. In my mid 30s I...
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Discretion

“Are you discreet?” “Do you live alone” “Do your neighbours know?”
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Fear

While I was still closeted, I tried to have a more serious relationship dynamic with a man. It started with a level of warmth, nurturing and attention I had never...
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Friendship

My friend Alex and I met through the dating site OKCupid. We had a mutual interest in making new friendships, so we set up plans one Friday evening to hang...
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Mentors

Natalia
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Community

I feel very lucky that I’ve managed to make a lot of friends with other trans women and gender non-conforming people in Toronto. There’s been a lot of positive outcomes...
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Paying It Forward

After spending enough time building my own confidence in public, I felt like I had the capacity to give back to people who were in the situation I once was...
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Chasers

chaser | ˈCHāsər | noun
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Love and Triangles

I recently ended the first relationship I’ve ever had where I fell in love with a man. Beyond that there were a lot of other firsts and I grew as...
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Clarity

In April of 2024 I finished coming out with my family. As of writing this that’s actually only a few weeks ago. There was a 2 1/2 year gap between...
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Outro (final game story writing)

Thanks for taking the time to read as much or as little of this as interested you.
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I came out trans on Facebook this week

A few days ago I finally mustered the courage to come out to my extended family and old friends on Facebook about my gender identity. In comparison to the hurdle...
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I'm starting a new job in a week and I’m not out as trans yet in my career

With the exciting news that I’m starting a new job has come the anxieties of starting a new job. Particularly the anxieties you get after you’ve come out trans everywhere...
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Starting the new job

Yesterday I started my new job. I had a surprising amount of anxiety building up in the days just prior, for a couple key reasons:
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Relationships with men; the biggest challenge in my life

This is one of the hardest personal blog posts I’ve ever had to write. I’ve actually been sitting on this topic for weeks mulling over the content, the tone and...
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On the subject of transition and feeling

I recently wrote about my challenges with the world of seriously dating men, or attempting so. This was a kind of a heavy subject and a pretty big brain dump...
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On meeting old friends and family for the first time

I have an old friend that I’ve known since I was 6 years old. The other night at my parents place we had a dinner with him, his gf and...
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Reflections on 1 year of hormone replacement

Recently I hit my 1-year mark of hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Many trans folks consider the year markers to be like the anniversaries of their rebirth. I’m not sure I...
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I’m living in a transient state

In my line of work we sometimes talk about “transient states” which, in software application terms, usually refers to the temporary animations from one state to another. e.g When you...
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A limerick

There once was a girl named Kai
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Years and years

It’s been a while since I’ve found the time to sit down and write in long form. I’ve been active on Instagram still, just because sometimes it’s easier sometimes to...
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I Came Out Trans at Work

Back in June, I wrote about starting a new job and feeling apprehensive about coming out as trans right away. I was fairly confident it would happen eventually, but I...
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What triggered my transition

It took so much for me to start to really explore my gender identity. Years of questioning my orientation. Years of trans fascination that did not seem attainable to me...
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Growing through, and out of, relationships

Sometimes I reflect back on the way I used to date before I started exploring and transitioning. I really have trouble understanding what I was doing at times. Not because...
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We all play the numbers game in online dating

I frequently hear the sentiment that women have it easier than men in online dating. This is because at a high level we most commonly see that women receive all...
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The Facial Feminization Journey - Part 1

It’s been yet another long break from blogging, but this has been a different kind of year so far. I think generally it’s a good thing when I’m not writing...
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The Facial Feminization Journey - Part 2

I decided to wait a little bit of time before I wrote the part 2 of this blog. Even at 6 months recovery, as I am now, there’s still plenty...
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